Mindset for Longevity in Combat Sports and Life
Considerations to train safely and effectively in martial arts. Concepts for success in the gym translate well to all areas of life.
I’ve been training in mixed martial arts and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu for over eight years and coaching for more than three. In that time, I’ve personally experienced and witnessed the impact mindset can have on training.
Technical proficiency and physical conditioning are imperative for growth.
How you approach training, however, is equally important to ensure you optimize learning opportunities and prevent unnecessary risk in combat sports and life.
Here are tips that I always emphasize with teammates to encourage safe and efficient growth:
Don't Try Too Hard
This seems counterintuitive at first.
Effort is required for progress. Overexertion, however, is counterproductive.
No one can give 90-100% for very long.
Exhaustion makes cowards of us all.
Dial back perceived exertion to a more manageable level and performance can be sustained. Endurance requires effort management.
Excessive effort also suppresses rational thinking. The harder you try, the less you think.
Prime Conor McGregor was a master at making his opponents emotional. If you're emotional and trying hard, your mental acuity is compromised and you're likely on your way to losing.
Beyond endurance and rationality, exertion control also promotes injury prevention.
This lesson took me a while to learn when I first started training as I was very athletic and wanted to show my teammates I could hold my own.
It didn't go well… all of my injuries in the first year (popped rib, strained elbow, and partially torn MCL) were the result of overexertion and ego.
Trying hard with poor technique to get out of a compromised position is a recipe for disaster.
Put forth your best effort without trying too hard. Physical endurance, mental acuity, and risk of injury are all benefited by exertion management.
Breathe
Respiration is your most reliable intensity gauge and stress reduction tool.
Breathing pairs well with exertion management. Conscious control of your breath rate is an excellent governor for exertion.
Watch the best fighters, they’re maintaining rhythmic, nasal breathing throughout a fight. When there is shift to exclusive mouth breathing, fatigue is taking over.
Nasal breathing acts as a governor for output. You can’t go much harder than 80% when only breathing through the nose.
Intentionally practice nasal-only breathing to raise your baseline performance.
Emphasize this practice during all forms of training to make it a habit. When you notice a shift to mouth breathing, dial back intensity and regain composure.
Before you know it, your 80% may be better than an opponent’s max effort.
Optimize your breathing to enhance your performance.
Proficiency Before Efficiency
If you can't do it slow, you can't do it fast.
Many try to rush through techniques, drills, and training in general.
Slow down.
Use drilling and learning of techniques to go as slow as possible, especially when your coach is around to get feedback and prevent bad habits from forming.
Technical proficiency is the foundation for future effective efficiency.
Ego Management
We all have egos and it's impossible to completely leave them at the door. Rather than completely suppress your drive to excel, shift the competitive spirit to conquering yourself.
Absorb that concept.
Execute a technique slowly and flawlessly multiple times.
Ask questions.
Take notes after class.
Drill the skills that you see applying to your game.
Apply your ego to learning, not winning.
Develop a Foundation in Effective Defense
As an amateur, most opponents are going to be better than you. Rather than trying to beat them, initially learn how to survive. Concepts like framing, breathing, conserving, distancing, evading, and controlling will all serve a beginner in learning how to "lose" less often.
The hierarchy of defensive success is:
1. Surviving
2. Maintaining position
3. Escaping
4. Sweeping/transitioning to improved positioning
Emphasize defensive growth in training as your offense develops.
Know how to effectively survive so you can eventually thrive.
Learn to Assess Small Wins
Assess performance realistically by determining progress within your respective goals against various types of training partners.
Surviving a round with a superior opponent is a win. Tapping fewer times on average is a win. Recovering positions or getting back to neutral can be a win.
If you're of equal skill or experience as your training partner, wins may be executing the specific techniques and concepts you're looking to improve upon. Use these rolls as training and not competing unless you're preparing for a competition and you're doing agreed upon live rounds with coach oversight to stress test your A-game.
When significantly better than your training partner, work from compromised positions that you want to improve upon. Set aspirational goals such as hitting a specific technique a certain number of times in a given round.
Train specifically to improve rather than generally to win.
If you’re trying to beat your training partner every sparring round, you're limiting your growth.
Small wins lead to stacked skill development.
Avoid Bad Training Partners
Bad apples are inevitable.
Your reason for training and how you go about it may be very different than someone else. If you have a bad feeling about someone, no coach should make you roll live with anyone or do anything else you don't want to do.
Competitors with world championship aspirations aside, you are training for self-improvement in some way both in and outside the gym. No need to create unnecessary pressure to roll with people that make you uncomfortable. You can discretely avoid unnecessary safety risks and people without causing contention.
Know your why and respond accordingly.
Bad training partners are a liability that aren’t worth the risk.
Be a Good Training Partner
A great way to understand what bad training partners look like is to be a good training partner.
You can be an example regardless of skill level.
A good training partner:
Matches intensity appropriately to your partner's experience and goals
Communicates clearly about injuries or limitations before rolling
Is generous with knowledge when asked
Maintains good hygiene (trimmed nails, clean gi, recently showered, etc)
Avoids dangerous techniques, especially on or as a beginner
Applies submissions carefully and is willing to lose a position over risk of injuring a teammate
Respects taps immediately
Shows up consistently and is reliable
In the gym, our most important assets are our teammates. Take care of them to encourage their taking care of you.
Collective growth is the goal.
Tap Early, Reflect, and Ask for Feedback
When in a compromised position, especially with one of your limbs, tap.
Don't concern yourself on late escape techniques as a beginner. The best way to escape an armbar or a leg lock is to not end up with that limb isolated in the first place.
Focus on early and mid-stage defense and then tap as soon as you feel your limb extended in any way. Late-stage defense shouldn't be considered until there is color on your belt, you've been training for a significant amount of time, are comfortable in those positions, and/or trust your training partners.
Reflect on the moments you tap. Ask your training partners for feedback on those specific circumstances to encourage lessons for defense earlier.
Growth can come from your teammates just like it can from your coaches when you have an open mind and beginner’s mindset.
Embrace failure safely and then learn from it.
Situational Sparring
During open rolls or whenever possible, train specific positions with agreed upon goals. This inherently helps remove ego that may come from a live sparring round. The spar is now directed at a position rather than an open-ended fight.
No more perceived winning, just learning through high numbers of repetitions against a resisting opponent.
Situational sparring is my go-to for skill development.
Not good at maintaining control of someone's back? Spar specifically in that position. Start on someone's back with the goal of maintaining the position or submitting from it with your opponent's goal being to escape. Once one of those conditions happens, reset and do it again. Do this for five minutes and then switch.
The options are endless and the benefits are extraordinary.
Train to Become Comfortable Being Uncomfortable
Being underneath a bigger and stronger opponent who is actively trying to make you uncomfortable is stress-inducing.
Despite physical alarm signals like fatigue or discomfort, the mind controls the body.
Learning how to stay calm despite chaos is a superpower.
Aside from sparring, isometric holds like the plank, horse pose, split squat, and others are all excellent ways to train the stress response when the body is uncomfortable.
Learning to maintain composure through challenge and stay rational translates to all life domains, including the mats, so you can make effective decisions regardless of circumstance.
Physical Training
Supplemental physical training is critical for injury prevention and performance.
Areas to consider:
Mobility
Strength
Power
Stamina
Endurance
Remember that these physical adaptations serve your goals in training to be a well-rounded and capable human.
Prioritize skill development.
with Lethal Gentlemen Manifesto and with Weekly Flex are two of the best sources I’ve found for specific guidance on how to optimize your body for combat performance.
Recovery
The difference between sustained performance and burnout is simply recovery.
Recovery essentials:
Adequate sleep
Proper nutrition and hydration
Mobility and activity
Listening to your body
Meaningful rest
There are no hacks. Burning the candle at both ends is going to lead to problems.
If you’re serious about improvement, become serious about recovery.
Recover smart to train hard (and smart).
Be Patient
Comfort comes from confidence, and it's difficult to be confident when you don't have many skills. Developing proficiency and gaining experience is imperative to establishing self-assurance.
The goal is to initially become consciously competent when drilling - being able to effectively move your body and apply concepts and techniques to a level of your coach's satisfaction. Then work toward conscious competence in sparring, where you're able to rationally think about how to get small wins on your opponents.
Eventually, with enough quality repetitions, you'll develop unconscious competence - the ability to execute techniques reflexively without conscious thought.
The path to mastery is a lifelong endeavor.
Be patient with yourself and the process.
Slow is smooth and smooth is fast. Rushing only leads to risk and unnecessary setbacks.
Keep showing up with the right mindset and the sky is the limit.
Conclusion
Combat sports training is a challenging but rewarding pursuit. Throughout this post, I’ve provided principles that can transform anyone’s training experience to make it safer, more effective, and fulfilling.
Remember that consistent application of these principles, not just occasional implementation, is what separates those who persevere from those who plateau or quit. Manage your mindset, respect your body's limits, and approach each session with intention. By training intelligently you'll not only improve your combat skills but also develop resilience that extends far beyond the mats.
Training can be used as a vehicle for becoming better at life.
Stay patient, remain humble, and trust the process. Your future self will thank you for the foundation you're building today.
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Kyle Shepard, a man whose life embodies the very essence of resilience and Stoic principles. As a military Resilience Instructor and father of three, Kyle doesn't just teach mental toughness – he lives it. He's a Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu brown belt, former world record holder for burpees, and has spent over a decade teaching warriors how to stay strong under pressure. But what truly sets Kyle apart isn't his impressive credentials. It's how he's transformed personal struggles into wisdom, combining Stoic principles with real-world experience.
-Stoic Wisdoms
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I love the image 😍 being visual speaks to my own way of story telling.
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